How one’s friends and beloved coexist.

I have heard or seen a bit of the typical idea that one’s friends cease to exist once they have a partner, or that maybe their friends and their significant other do not seem to hit it off. Also the happy cases in which both become friends.

I have few close friends that truly mean a lot to me. With one of them I talk through messages almost daily, with another only by call every three months or everyday for 5 hours straight for a certain period of time (there is no in between). Then there is one of my classmates whom I talk a lot since we study together, I admire her dearly. But I digress.

Once Iliyan stepped into my life one could think that I neglected my friends, I will not lie, he did and has more priority than anybody else, however I will always be there for my friends if they needed me.

As time went on —and Iliyan and I became more and more serious with our relationship— I wondered if my friends and him, with time, could maybe become friends as well. There are cases in which friends dislike their friend’s partner and that might create a bit of a wall between them. However, I tended not to worry too much about that, Iliyan was wonderful. He was kind, loving and very caring towards my close friends, he would even encourage me to call them more. I doubted they could dislike him! Luckily, my close friends do like my fiancé, as well as he, my friends. One of them even conspired with Iliyan without me being aware of it! She wanted his help to choose a present for my birthday and for him to be on the lookout for the package once it arrived. Silly fluffs.

An international cuisine dinner at a dear friend of ours. We had so much fun! Eating, talking and playing games.

Iliyan and I spend a lot of time together, nevertheless, I do not want to push my partner onto everybody I know, I will introduce him and definitely have talked about him to everybody I am acquainted to, but I also know that some people that are familiar with me, do not necessarily want to spend time with both of us. My brother even jokes about how “glued” we are to each other.

‘Hey Adina, do you want to come with us to this place?’ asked my brother.

‘Sure.’ I said.

‘But, why do you not ask Iliyan as well?’ asked my mother.

‘Because there is no need, they always come as a package.’ He replied.

As much as it makes me laugh and blush, it is completely true, call it the “honeymoon phase” or what you may, but we do love each other’s company.

There are also friends whom I have met when Iliyan was already in my life as my significant other, they have invited us both when they were doing a party or something similar. It makes me very happy that we are making friends as a couple.

In the end, how one handles their friends/acquaintances and beloved depends quite a lot on the individual. You might need to accept that they do not like each other and not put them into situations where they have to be together. Friendships, like love, should be natural and not forced.

No matter what, talk with your friends and your partner, see how they feel, and act accordingly. They are both important for you, show it to them.


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